Radio Ad Transcript
Narrator: In an ancient land, before time or sundials, it was time for a hero. This Fall, prepare to believe all over again, once more, again. Dragon Brain - prepare to believe.
Woman: It’s a time before time... Oh no, here come the fucking dragons!
Man: We need a hero, or evil will reign for 2000 generations, and a million orcs will storm these lands, and the CGI bill will be apocalyptic!
Narrator: Dragon Brain - prepare to love.
Hero: I’m only a humble blacksmith with a California accent. How can I possibly rise up and conquer evil without a montage?
Man: How indeed? Do you believe?
Hero: I believe, in the miracle of merchandising! I’ll need a furry talking sidekick to spew one-liners while I chop off heads!
Sidekick: (sound of decapitation) Don’t lose your head! Hehehe!
Man: We shall spin gold out of this drivel.
Narrator: Prepare to sit through a four hour journey.
Hero: I’ve got a quest: I must defeat evil, and sell franchise rights to theme parks!
Woman: We’re cursed! The dragons! They're flying upside down!
Man: Nooo! The CG machine is broken again!
Hero: (yelling) DRAGON BRAIN!
Narrator: The quest is yours. Dragon Brain; coming soon to a theater near you. Rated "G" for gibberish.
- A 'Dragon Brain' theme tune can be purchased from Vipluxuryringtones.com and used as a phone ringtone.