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Grainoftruth.net

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Grainoftruth.net is the main website for the organic food market, The Grain of Truth, featured in Grand Theft Auto V. 

On website

Naturally exclusive

Some say that we sell ludicrously over-price gourmet organic food marketed under the guise of social and environmental responsibility so that yuppies feel less guilty about spending $30 on some precut carrots sticks when half the world is starving.

That's not true. Food should be expensive. It's what you put in your body. So pay as much for it as things you wear or drive. It's much more important.

As soon as you enter The Grain of Truth parking lot - you'll notice - these are people like me! Happy people emerging from hybrid automobiles clutching hemp shopping bags with jolly children. People that listen to public radio while drinking wine and love to discuss gay marriage and why conservatives are so mean. You may be upper middle class and guilt ridden, but only one thing really separates you from the unwashed blue color heathens: food snobbery. The Grain of Truth reinforces your status as a clutured, sophisticated urbanite. When you see products that use the words "organic", "natural", "fair trade", "macrobiotic", "gluten-free", "cruelty-free" or "farm-to-table" on the packaging are you really going to quibble with price? What other store sells apples harvested by people in wheelchairs? Take your heart out and hand it over - it has the number 100 on it with a president's face - now, don't you feel better?

Sorry

Food stamps are not accepted.

If you are on welfare, you really shouldn't be buying $30 a quart organic goats milk and artisanal cheeses. We can't, however, stop you from digging through the dumpsters in back. We wholeheartedly support the freegan movement apart from when they annoy us, and we set private security on them.

Capitalism with a conscience. How we're saving the world.

We're all about sustainability. We've sustained record profits for the last 10 years. The Grain of Truth only sells products that meet the vague standards we've set for being natural, organic and fair trade. Those being - is it made in nature? Was it once an organism? And are we making a fair profit? That's how we convince people they're doing their bit for the environment and sticking to corporate America by buying a $12-plaintain from a massive publicly-listed supermarket chain, even though it's travelled 8,000 miles on a jet plane.

Eco-chic

With the brown recycled hemmp sackcloth Grain of Truth shopping bag. $60. It's the new status symbol. Available in-store now.

Supporting local farmers!

While 99% of our products are grown on a few corporate mega-farms that claim to have cut back on their use of pesticides, it's the other 1% we really want you to know about. Hipsters are obsessed with the local food movement. That's why you'll se photos of happy smiling small-batch organic farmers all over our stores.

These are not stock photographs.

This week's bargain specials. Earthy food at unearthly prices...

Sudanese kumquats - $22.95 per pound
  1. Russian freekeh - $19.95 per pound
  1. Liberian lacinato kale - $29.50 per pound
  1. Syrian wild ramps - $87.99 per pound
  1. Karachi kohirabi - $18.99 per pound
  1. Dwarf head cheese - $93.80 per pound
  1. Goat piss and milk - $14.30 a quart
  1. Alaskan carob - $31.99 per pound
  1. Wild tempeh harvested by Native Americans - $17.95 per pound

This week's bargain specials. Earthy food at unearthly prices...

Please forgive the matted hair, face piercings, dirty fingernails and condescending attitude. Our young, progressive cashies don't just serve you, they judge you. If your basket doesn't contain a varied healthy selection from all the major food groups, they'll send you back into the aisles. If they see a mother feeding formula to a baby, they'll throw her out. If you ask for a plastic shopping bag, they'll spit in your face.

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