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MyRoom's main page directs to several people's profiles, much like "Cool New People" on MySpace, and each profile is a satire of a stereotypical MySpace user. Some profiles include:
- hUnybUn 167: A teenage girl using Alt Caps, a method of typing usually used by adolescent girls that involves capitalizing random letters (jUsT LIkE ThIs). It is often said that the purpose is to demand the reader's attention by having them focus on each word. She uses it for the entire profile, and it is very difficult to read, especially because the profile is also in bright, tacky colors. She is an aspiring model, usually doing borderline sexual favors in exchange for gifts. Her interests include partying and "celebs". Her friends are mostly like-minded young girls who also comment on her profile using Alt Caps.
- damagedwisd0m: An example of an obese high school girl with low self-esteem, who is an outcast at school, gets cruelly teased by her more popular classmates, and instead prides herself as an intellectual (a hand-in-hand relationship typical of the obese child demographic).
- blackfrost5: A moody college student, might be considered emo, who recently lost his girlfriend, writes poetry about how he is misunderstood, suicidal and in an alternate universe. He eventually calls himself the most boring man on MyRoom.
- flaptickler: One profile of a man who mostly just gives a highly positive review of his sex doll. He comments that it resembles pop singer Samantha Muldoon. He also likes guns and is violent towards most other women, drives an ice cream truck, and personally admits that he's really creepy.
- ravenvamp11: A pale and frail high school girl deeply indulged in vampire phenomena (a la Twilight or possibly Ann Rice). In particular, she discusses sucking on her boyfriend's open wounds as a means of vampire enactment, but warns about the possibility of an STD (in addition to both of them being sexually active). Because she's mad at her parents, her boyfriend "Dunkan the Morbid" offers to kill them, and just as she is writing it on her page, police bust in to arrest her, and admits "maybe putting every stupid cunty thought I've ever had for anyone to read isn't the brightest idea."
- xtrajuicychick69: Used by a pedophile, out of a warehouse in Bohan, posing as a "16 I meant 18" attractive young girl who talks extensively about her burning desire to have sex with young boys. One MyRoom user confirms that it is a dirty old man, and that he was asked to change his diaper, while "Lil Francis", under a different profile name but more than likely pimpdog1620 below, was fooled and planned to meet the girl.
- eddielowfilthslayer: Used by Eddie Low, a serial killer that Niko has the chance of randomly meeting in person. He has zero friends.
- pimpdog1620: Profile used by Francis "Lil Frankie" Ferguson, a stereotypical "Wigger", or a young (usually upper-class) white male who tries unnaturally to blend in with the gangster rap scene. The boy in particular is the son of an extremely wealthy banker in Algonquin, who outwardly expresses that he wishes he weren't rich or white. He also dramatizes the death of his dog Fluffy, just as a street gang would mourn a friend who was killed. His mother comments on his profile saying she "didn't spend $15,000 a year on your education for you to speak like this. I just hope your father doesn't find out." and that she would consider buying him a new dog. In the Grand Theft Auto universe, "16:20" is the counterpart of "4:20", a ritualistic time of day that many people smoke marijuana (because the in-game clock uses military time and not AM/PM).
In a report on Weazel News, millions of sex offenders have accounts. An old woman states that the site should be shut down; her profile has a picture of herself taking a sponge bath and "no one wants to be her friend". A younger girl states that she has 10,000 "best" friends "who are actually strangers who stalk her".
Aside from each person's profiles, there are other stereotypes drawn from MySpace (and Facebook) such as cyberstalking, people's need for other people to comment on their pictures (and cries for attention in general), and dating website spam disguised as women's comments.