Our-own-reality.com

The Home page of Our Own Reality.

our-own-reality.com is a news website on the Internet in Grand Theft Auto IV, The Lost and Damned and The Ballad of Gay Tony, much like the Liberty Tree and Weazel News websites, except it doesn't report things that Niko Bellic does throughout the storyline or anything other than celebrity news. The only articles that remotely effect Niko are the website's expose on Bryce Dawkins being gay, and a short ridicule they make of Brucie Kibbutz.

The website is a parody of gossip news sources such as TMZ, and serves the purpose of being a satire on 2000s-era celebrity obsession. They parody the exploits of celebrities like Angelina Jolie, Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, Britney Spears and her 2007 breakdown, and Sean "Diddy" Combs among others. Elements are also taken from British (Kate Moss and the British royal family) and even Russian (billionaire Andrey Melnichenko and his marriage to model Aleksandra Kokotovic) tabloid culture. During the course of the game, they specifically report on:

(After the last mission, "A Revenger's Tragedy" or "Out of Commission")

• Bryce Dawkins is effectively exposed as being homosexual after a photo turns up of him kissing "a MALE fitness instructor". Dawkins aggressively denies that he is gay, but goes to a rehab clinic for reasons he would not elaborate on (strong rumors say the facility treats sex addictions). The photo does not feature Bryce's kiss, but only Bryce's image next to a gay-looking man who is not his boyfriend Bernie Crane. Though the text description matches Bernie (fitness instructor living in a lavish apartment), it is more than possible that Bryce had several boyfriends.
• Samantha Muldoon adopts a 14th child.
• Tyler Dixon gets his ponytail shortened slightly
• Tony McTony severely beat a stripper from The Triangle Club in Bohan during sex. Several of McTony's girlfriends, who were also likely beaten, defended McTony and said she "had it coming". McTony was only punished with 3 days of community service.
• "Like" voted word of the year, followed by "Whatever" and "Totally".
• A very positive review of the dance film "Popping".
• Kerry McIntosh chases a paparazzi who peeped into her bathroom with a kitchen knife.

(After "Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend")

• Tyler Dixon requests $3 million dowry from Cloe Parker. Other elements of their relationship are discussed; Cloe is the mother of a three-month old black baby which she normally lacks proper caution in caring for (reference to criticisms of Britney Spears' parenting skills, Dixon is also a parody of Spears' ex-husband Kevin Federline). Dixon claims the child is his, even though he is white and he met Cloe only two months before the baby was born. Cloe's billionaire father also stated that he sorely disapproves of Dixon.
• Cherise McCormic, a 1980s celebrity featured on Waning With The Stars, may have faked being a drug addict to appear on the show.
• Reality shows struggling to find "cranky" British judges, a reference to singing judge Simon Cowell.
• Condemning Crastenburg for a small amount of cellulite
• In response to Brucie Kibbutz's persistence (see below), the staff of the website briefly mock him and demand he leave them alone.
• Tony McTony criticized for giving his newborn son Pete McTony "too normal a name".
• Liberty Governor candidates John Hunter and Michael Graves participate in an immature online flame war to appeal to younger voters.
• Samantha Muldoon switches religions 3 times in 1 week, eventually deciding on the Epsilon Cult.

(After "Tunnel of Death" - Brucie sends a second email)

• Kerry McIntosh crashes her car into a Wigwam Burger restaurant after checking out of rehab.
• Furries debate over realism vs. better positions during sex. (image shown of a woman in a Cluckin' Bell Chicken uniform)
• Tyrone "Tower" Hancock, a washed-up 1980s basketball star, French kisses a homeless man.
• Cloe Parker and Jill Von Crastenburg fight and make up five times in a single evening at Maisonette 9, which included catfights and drunken bisexual behavior. One instigator was Crastenburg saying hello to Parker's ex-boyfriend, also at the club.
• Katt Maguire poops on the sidewalk outside a London nightclub (poop up for sale on Craplist.net for $300).
• JNV begins a crash diet (possibly anorexia) to better her career.
• Kirk Simplex buys his 8th English castle.
• Weazel News launching a new channel, Weazel War, showing what Our Own Reality calls "US troops kicking ass around the world" 24 hours a day.

(After "Actions Speak Louder than Words - Brucie Kibbutz will send Niko a link to the site, and tells him that as hard as he tries to get featured on the site, sending in workout photos and even sex tapes, they are only reporting on Tony McTony and Tyrone "Tower" Hancock)

• Tony McTony plans to sue LC24 magazine for defamation, after they said he has a Napoleon complex. The article includes a short biography of him and his lifestyle.
• Traci Wilson, once the MVP and 10-year captain of the American soccer team Liberty City Cocks, is working at a Burger Shot in Los Santos.
• Ernesto Asaltacunas has dinner with his mother.
• Charles Martin, an Alderney Senator, is thought to have posed for a homoerotic "goatse" screensaver.
• Crotch shots from the paparazzi are becoming cliche.
• The site tries to spread a rumor about an English gay celebrity couple, artists named Simon & Nigel. They presume Simon cheated on Nigel after a checkup from his dentist. They have also recently done art shows consisting of gruesome historical events, reenacted with themselves dressed as gorillas (they are separately mentioned in I'm Rich as having done murals in Jill Von Crastenburg's home).
• Julian Glockwell, the co-star of the 1980s action show Angel and the Knight, quit his poorly-received blog.
• A streaker from a Liberty City Penetrators game issued a press statement that it was a very cold day, referring to his penis size.

(Beginning of GTA IV / Throughout The Lost and Damned and The Ballad of Gay Tony)

• Jill Von Crastenburg's sex tape.
• Condemning JNV for a small amount of cellulite.
• A gardener of the British royal family claims one of its members is a hermaphrodite (it's implied that the website paid him to lie).
• Kirk Stapleton loses his tongue in a stage accident during the play "The Flying Whore".
• Samantha Muldoon's twenty minute marriage to Kirk Simplex.
• January Natasha Vasquez walking down the street.