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Spoiler Warning: Plot details, ending details, or both are in the text which follows.
Spoiler Warning: Plot details, ending details, or both are in the text which follows.
Warning
Warning

Alright my boy. Pretty little thing ain'tcha. And we want to keep you like that. Things have been getting out of hand and we need you to mend a few broken pipes. Fix a few ungrateful little gits. Or Archie'll lose his temper and nobody'll be happy.
— Albert Crisp to the GTA London Protagonist in 1969.

Albert Crisp is a character in the Grand Theft Auto series who appears as a main antagonist in Grand Theft Auto: London 1969. He was voiced by the late John Berger.[1]

History[]

Background[]

He and his silent twin brother Archie Crisp are the sons of a Duchess known as Mrs. Crisp. In the early 1960s, they lead an unnamed crime organization in London, England.

In his description on the Official GTA London website, Albert says:

'Ello, gorgeous! Yes, we could do with one of your kind to serve me peeled grapes in a loin cloth. Oh, you think you're a bit of a boy do you? Somethin' of a would-be and might-yet-be, eh? Well, we'll see, we'll see. I've eaten more hard men, and tough kids than you've had hot dinners, sunshine. Tough guys? I shit 'em. But if you got somethin' special to offer, then we can maybe find you somethin' to do. There's always mess to be cleaned up in this line of work, and I'm always after a decent cleaner.

This ain't a nice world, bleedin' filthy if you ask me, and if you didn't ask me, I'm tellin' you. It's soddin' filthy. So you got to be tough, as well as pretty, to get by. And me and Arch' have more than got by. We rule this filthy world, from top to bottom. 'Cause we do what needs to be done. We put up with idiots like ol' Harold, and upstarts like Parkinson, just as long as they don't tread on our toes, and don't do anythin', anythin' at all, to offend me ol' dear. 'Cause if anyone irritates the Duchess, they better have a very good doctor. And soon, she might be a Duchess, proper like, 'cause me an' Arch have started to mix with royalty. Met a lovely posh nob done the boozer out Chelsea way the other week. Lucan or somthin'. I don't know. But we look after many a one like him. Members of Parliament and all. And they look after us.

That's how it works here. Only they better look after us proper, like, or I'll bite their bits off. Know what I mean? I'm sure you do, don't he, Arch? 'Cause London, these days, it ain't like it use to be. It's a filthy place. Government sold us down the river since that war. I mean, we bloody won it, didn't we? And we'll win this war, 'cause there's a bit of trouble in town at the moment. Some little kid thinks he can hold Albert bloody Crisp to blackmail? I invented soddin' blackmail. Didn't I, Archie? Look, do you know where I can get me a few blues? What do you say, Arch, like the look of this one? No, I ain't sure either.
— Albert Crisp

Before the Events of Grand Theft Auto: London 1969[]

Done the business in Vice City? Well, I don't give a monkey's, end neither does Archie. Those Yanks ain't worth a pint of piss, so show some respect. You’re in London now, and don’t you forget it.
— Albert Crisp in the official GTA London 1969 manual.

At some point between 1961 and 1969, Albert sent the GTA London Protagonist to Vice City in the United States of America to do an unknown job for them.

Events of Grand Theft Auto: London 1969[]

Along with his silent twin brother Archie Crisp, they provide the character with odd jobs. The Crisp brothers are the bosses of crime lords Harold Cartwright and Jack Parkinson who try to become a bit more independent. Albert is considered the brains of the operation and gives instructions to the player while Archie remains silent.

In 1969, after the GTA London Protagonist returns to London, Albert sends an unnamed representative of his to give them jobs on his behalf. The first job is stealing a Mod Scooter for Albert so he can gift it to his mother. While they were out of town, the Battersea Mods street gang have been hassling the Crisp Twins and their organization, so Albert sends Harold Cartwright, the protagonist's boss in the early 1960s, and his associate Pretty Charlie to assist the protagonist in this problem.

Shortly after the protagonist completes Pretty Charlie's jobs, Albert Crisp purchases a collection of expensive paintings from a German contact of his, Doctor Zel. After the protagonist collects the paintings from Zel, however, it is revealed he actually stole them from the National Gallery in Westminster, and the Special Branch have been brought in to investigate the art theft. Shortly after, the protagonist manages to kidnap and kill Zel, after pushing a London Cab with him inside into the River Thames with the help of Jack Parkinson. Eventually, the protagonist is asked to meet Jack Parkinson in South Mile End. Once there, Jack congratulates the protagonist as he is becoming a "big face in this filthy cesspit", and tells the protagonist that he wants to take over the Crisp Twins' organization for himself very soon.

The protagonist is later informed that a Member of Parliament is hassling one of Albert Crisp's friends and needs to be dealt with; however, the police need to be distracted first. The protagonist manages to kidnap a group of German tourists in front of the Palace of Westminster in order to distract the police, before kidnapping the MP and getting reward money from Buckingham Palace after saving him from a group of Battersea Mods.

The protagonist also assists the Crisp Twins in small-time jobs, such as delivering illegal rhino skin rugs to them, stealing a Copper for an unknown job, and destroying a Tanker in the middle of an intersection in order to cause a distraction for one of their jobs. The protagonist eventually meets the Crisp Twins in person in Northeast Bow. Once there, Albert Crisp will tell the protagonist that things have been getting out of hand, and orders them to "mend a few broken pipes and fix a few ungrateful little gits", otherwise his brother Archie will lose his temper, threatening the protagonist.

After Albert Crisp’s warning, the protagonist is contacted by the Twins' contact to go to the red telephone boxes in West Angel to get more jobs. These jobs are mostly personal favors for the Crisps themselves. These jobs include stealing and test driving cars to be used by the Twins during their bank jobs, destroying security cameras around the City district and blowing up a Royal Pain tank driving around St. James's Square in Soho using a Rocket Launcher, driving prostitutes to their clients, killing the Crisps' rival pimp Rough Tony for beating one of their prostitutes, and scaring a group of Football Hooligans at the Battersea Park who cornered one of the Mob's associates. The protagonist also assists the Crisps in some small-time jobs, such as delivering Indian food to them, delivering bootleg Trojan demos to a store, and delivering an abandoned Double Decker to their garage.

Albert begins suspecting that Harold Cartwright stole his personal supply of drugs behind his back and personally asks the protagonist to kill him and his gang. After killing Harold and his gang, the protagonist steals his red Locust and drives it to the Crisps' garage, as Albert assumes the drugs are hidden in it. However, it is discovered that there were no drugs in the car, which means Harold did not steal them after all. Albert does not care, however, saying Harold "was a useless prat anyway".

The protagonist eventually meets Terry Dorkins, involved with the Battersea Power Station job that the protagonist has previously participated in, who informs the protagonist that the Crisp Twins have run out of patience with Lenny Smith (also involved with the aforementioned job) and his gang for some unknown reason. After killing his gang members and Lenny's brother Reg, the protagonist confronts Lenny and he reveals to the protagonist that the Crisp Twins are getting paranoid due to them getting high on their own supply of drugs, and they plan to eventually kill the protagonist for apparently "giving them the cold shoulder". Lenny explains to the protagonist that they must kill them to take control of the town. After listening to Lenny try and talk his way out of it, the protagonist must kill him.

Gordan Bennett that was some firework. Look... There must have been some mistake flower. Well look... Just so you don't come at us with a bleedin A-Bomb next time. We're getting out of here. Archie's off to Devon, and I'm leaving the country. Heading for Thailand actually... Very posh.
— Albert Crisp in the final mission of GTA London 1969.

Albert eventually starts panicking, thinking the protagonist is going to kill him and Archie, so they try to escape London. However, the protagonist is warned about it by Jack Parkinson via telegram. The protagonist tracks down the Crisp Twins' car and explodes it with them inside. However, The Twins survive the explosion but admit defeat to the protagonist. Albert tells the protagonist that Archie is moving to Devon and he is moving to Thailand to make sure the protagonist "won't throw a bleeding A-Bomb next time."

It is assumed that Jack Parkinson took over most of the Crisps' actions after they were wiped out and banned from London by the protagonist.

Gallery[]

Mission Appearances[]

Grand Theft Auto: London 1969[]

Trivia[]

  • Both Albert and his brother are unambiguously based on Ronald and Reginald Kray, twin brothers who were notorious criminals in London from the 1950s to 1967.[2]

References[]

  1. Newswire post
  2. I remember [Dan Houser]'s initial explanation was that it was a parody of British crime wave stories. The impression I got from him was that it was going to be full of jokes, cockney slang, caricatures of the Krays, etc. Greg Bick always tried to inject comedy in his game designs, so there would have been zero resistance there anyway.
    Ray Larabie - "THE MAKING OF GTA London, Rockstar's Daring Detour Into The Swinging Sixties", TimeExtension (November 29, 2022)

Navigation[]

[ ve ]Grand Theft Auto: London 1969 characters
ProtagonistsRodney Morash | Sid Vacant | Maurice Caine | Mick Casey | Johnny Hawthorn | Winston Henry | Charles Jones | Wolfie Vilans
Main charactersHarold Cartwright | Jack Parkinson | Albert Crisp | Archie Crisp | Pretty Charlie | The Crisps' Contact
Supporting charactersChalkie | Keith | Noles Brothers | Beryl Cartwright | Doctor Zel | Sidney Moore | Midnight | Midnight's Associate | Fingers | Terry Dorkins | Lenny Smith | Lord Lucan | Gary | Arthur | Filthy Colin | Romeo | British Government Contact | Hans Nemesis | Rough Tony | Cyprus Phil | Gerald | Reg Smith
Mentioned charactersQueen of England | Endeavour Chambers | Agent Temple | Len | Honest Ray | Mrs. Crisp | Lee "Scratch" Perry | Razors
Radio DJsDoctor Peter Pants-On
† denotes Deceased, Italics denotes a status determined by the player's choice
Characters in GTA London 1969 | Category:Characters in GTA London 1969 | Grand Theft Auto: London 1961 | Category:Characters
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